I'm not your Castiel
by BrokenDream83
Summary: 4x20 - Jimmy is coming home. Someone wanna talk to him....


**Disclaimer**: I don't own Supernatural or its characters.

**A/N**: thanks to " Castiel Anna Together Forever" XD

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Jimmy was sitting on the bus that would take him home to his family.

He didn't know what had happened to Castiel, maybe he had disobeyed orders.

Jimmy didn't know and to be honest, he didn't care.

That poor man wanted just go home.

Those guys were crazy, he didn't remember anything.

Well, anything useful for demons.

All that he remembered was Anna and the intense and painful feelings that Castiel felt when she was close.

Anger, disappointment, longing, jealousy.

Love? Yes, love.

Castiel loved Anna... Anael, but he was pissed with her.

She had fallen without caring about him and then she had made... something with Dean... Castiel was really pissed.

Yet he still loved her.

But Castiel was intransigent and would have never allowed Anna to get closer to him, even though he was in love with her.

He couldn't forgive her.

Jimmy was tired of angels, demons, seals and so on, he wanted just rejoin his family.

"Jimmy?"

A voice that sounded familiar made him jump.

He turned his head and recognized the woman who was looking at him curiously.

Anna was there, sitting next to him. She was beautiful and... worried, he thought.

"Do you know who I am?" she asked.

"Of course" replied Jimmy "you're Anna, also known as Anael. You're an angel."

Her heart missed a beat, it was Castiel voice... but looking in those eyes, Anna saw he wasn't Cas. The divine spark wasn't there anymore.

"Why did you run away?" she inquired.

Jimmy seemed annoyed. "Because I don't know anything about anything, I wanna go home and forget everything, your Castiel has used me like a puppet, now I'm done." he said exasperated.

"You are in danger, demons are looking for you. Sam and Dean can help you."

The vessel shook his head and looked out the bus window. "They don't wanna help me, they hope that Castiel comes back in his vessel, me" Jimmy turned his face to look at her "**you** hope he comes back."

She pretended not to hear. "You don't get it, if demons manage to catch you, they will torture you until you die, do you know?" Anna said trying to convince him.

She knew that Castiel wasn't there but it was nice to be there. Jimmy was his vessel, it was like talking with him.

"Please" he murmured "don't look at me like that."

Anna frowned "Like that? What do you mean?"

Jimmy smiled. "I'm not Castiel, I'm his vessel... he talks with my voice, but I'm not him. You look at me as if I were your angel, I'm not him."

"I really don't understand what are you saying" she snapped "I'm here for you, but if you don't wanna be helped, I can't do anything."

"Anna, Cas will never forgive you. Deal with it."

Her eyes clouded with sadness. "What are you talking about?"

"You know" he responded "Castiel can't forget what you have done. Even though..."

"Even though?"

Jimmy sighed and blinked. "Maybe I'm wrong, but I think he loves you. It's a bit blasphemous, I guess. But I'm kinda sure he is in love with you."

Anna couldn't help but smile. Jimmy had just told that Castiel loved her. It was the greatest day of her whole life.

"How... how do you know it?" asked the angel trying to hide her joy.

Jimmy looked into those hazel eyes, they were shining and showed all her love for Castiel. Anna was looking at him with love, he felt uncomfortable.

Anna understood it and lowered her eyes. "Sorry ..." she apologized.

"Never mind" replied Jimmy with a half smile "you can't control the heart. Anyway, I know because I felt it. When you were close, Castiel felt strange feelings. And my heart beat faster. I think he loves you, but at the same time he hates you."

The woman was confused: how could Cas love and hate at the same time? It was impossible! "I don't get it", she complained "can't he forgive me because I fell?"

The man shook his head. "It is not just for this. You have" he paused, embarrassed, "you know, the Impala, Dean ..."

Anna understood and blushed. "Oh .." she said nodding.

"Well .. he is angry for that too, maybe above all for that. So even if he feels love for you, he can't forget. I'm sorry."

"Are you saying he's jealous?"

"Yes, and I understand him. .. I mean if my wife had sex with some other man ... I'd go crazy." he confessed.

"But I and Castiel aren't married."

Jimmy nodded. "Maybe he thought so."

Anna's eyes widened, opened her mouth to respond but didn't know what to say.

"Anna, you seem surprised. I mean, it was obvious. You know, I don't remember much of my life with Castiel, but I remember perfectly this." Jimmy stopped and gazed at her. "Castiel thought you were his, even though you weren't together. So, when he has seen you and Dean well... he's very pissed."

She hid her face in her hands, she didn't know to have hurt him so much. But Anna didn't love Dean, she loved Castiel.

"Don't be sad, don't cry." said Jimmy resting his hand on her shoulder to comfort her.

She looked up and smiled. "It 's nice to talk with you, you don't push me away."

"He pushes you away because he's hurt."

"And it's all my fault." she admitted.

"I'm sorry."

"Jimmy, please, come back and join them. You are in danger, believe me."

"I wanna be with my family, I'm sorry Anna but I'm done. I don't come back. Castiel has to find some other vessel."

She shook her head. "I don't wanna you die because you're a good man! You really don't know what demons can do."

"I repeat" he said firmly "I don't know anything, I remember just what he feels for you. I don't think the demons wanna know this. I have a daughter and a wife waiting for me, maybe they think I'm dead. I wanna go home."

It was wrong, but Anna couldn't help but think that his wife was lucky, Jimmy was beautiful and good. He was the human version of Castiel, it was obvious that he was beautiful.

"I could take you with me by force, but I will not. The choice is yours, I cannot force you. Be careful." she said.

"I will. Goodbye Anna..."

Anna approached Jimmy and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm sorry, I know you are embarrassed, but it was my only chance to ... you know, even though he's gone, there is still some of his energy in you."

The angel went away, leaving Jimmy alone.

The man thought that if he weren't in love with his wife, he could fall in love with her.

Now he could understand why Cas loved Anna.

She was unique.


End file.
